Cover art for Brontosaurus by DinoKyu

Brontosaurus

Apr. 16, 20141 viewer

Brontosaurus Lyrics

Dino Talks Random Shit
Volume 1: My Take on the Brontosaurus

Let’s start this first Dino Talks blog off with something related to dinosaurs.

As a big fan of palaeontology it bothers me a lot that the Brontosaurus has become one of the most famous Dinosaurs to ever live. Except, it never did. It never existed at all. The Brontosaurus is a lie, it is a made up piece of fiction that does not deserve to be classified as a dinosaur. It doesn’t even deserve to be classified as a prehistoric organism at all. It is as fake as its name: "Thunder Lizard". You may ask yourself now

but Dino, Who the fuck calls a species such a name?!

Let me tell you, curious reader.

In 1877 a yale professor with the hideous name of Othniel Marsh found an incomplete skeleton of an juvenile Apatosaurus ajax, a giant sauropod that founded the basis for a new family of dinosaurs: The Apatosaurus.

With the Apatosaurus ajax being the only species within that family, Marsh went on searching and found another incomplete skeleton. It missed feet and skull, but was the largest dinosaur skeleton ever found at that point in time.
With this skeleton being similar to the original Apatosaurus, but a lot larger, Marsh had the genius idea of creating what he found it’s own species, the "Brontosaurus". Fun fact: He initially called the species "Atlantosaurus", but then went with "Brontosaurus" because the Atlantosaurus already existed and Marsh was too uneducated to know that.

Would he have paid closer attention to the first skeleton he found, he would have known that it was juvenile, making the second one actually not a new species, but an adult dinosaur oft he very same species.

Since our identity-robbed dinosaur did not have any feet or a head, Marsh took the head and feet of other dinosaurs and put it on the skeleton to create how he thought the Brontosaurus may have looked like. He went on to make the skeleton able for access in the Yale Museum, and the "Brontosaurus" became famous around the world.

It took almost 15 years for somebody, specifically being Marsh’s fellow palaeontologist Elmer Riggs (yet another stupid name) to then realize that a skeleton that is larger, but exactly the same to an Apatosaurus, is not a new species, but just a fucking Apatosaurus. Unfortunately, he missed out on bringing that information to the public, aside from his boring article in some Museum Newspaper that nobody ever cared about. He then declared the misinterpreted skeleton it’s own genus within the family and species of the Apatosaurus, an interpretation that is just as wrong as the one before, but was held as "not proven wrong" until the late 1990s.

Today, we know a little more about the Apatosaurus. The head and the feet that Marsh gave his skeleton were wrong and did not fit at all, the skeleton was just a large Apatosaurus (NOT a new species), and the term "Brontosaurus" is wrong in any way it has ever been used. Yet it remains the commonly used synonym for large dinosaurs with long necks.

The Brontosaurus went on and started a career as a fictional piece of shit that claimed to have existed, and even to this day conspiracy theorists claim it actually did exist. Sure it existed, just as did Hobbits, Golems and Rainbow coloured unicorns, right?

Would the Brontosaurus have been exposed as a misinterpretation more publicly, maybe it would be to us today what a unicorn really is: A fictional animal that consists of something real with random stuffon the head. The unicorn is a horse with a horn, the Brontosaurus is an Apatosaurus with a fake skull and un-matching feet. Would it have existed that way, it would have never been able to walk, think or eat & drink. That’s something the unicorn can do, so actually, the Brontosaurus is even faker than a unicorn.

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Release Date
April 16, 2014
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