The first rule of trophy travel is don’t talk about trophy travel. The second rule of trophy travel is that no one follows the first rule. They didn’t heed it back in the 1800s, when travelers in the latest couture—pith helmets—returned from Africa with breathless accounts of the Nile. And they didn’t observe it back in the 1970s, when couples threw dinner parties so they could inflict on their guests hour-long slide shows of their Club Med vacation. But social media is making things much worse. Now the only thing separating travelers from narcissistic pronouncements about how #euphoric and #awed they are by the grilled prawns they just ate at El Celler de Can Roca is a few taps on a smartphone.

Let us all agree: It is human nature to crave glorious, life-changing travel moments. But it is also human nature to become deeply annoyed by other people’s glorious, life-changing travel moments. So if you absolutely must break the first rule of trophy travel, do us all the courtesy of following these six rules:

DON’T tweet about fabulous meals. Ever. Not even if René Redzepi himself breaks into the Abruzzi villa you rented to serve you a white truffle omelet in bed made with eggs he laid himself. It sounds like you’re bragging. Because you are.

DON’T make it about you. For example, if you somehow score a tour of a Bordeaux winery that hasn’t opened its cellars to the public since the days of the Holy Roman Empire, do not begin your tweet/Facebook post with "OMG, I just…"

DO make it about people. If, during said tour, the head winemaker mentions that Robert Parker got it wrong and the best vintage is, in fact, 1984, by all means, share this pertinent and interesting tidbit.

DON’T go big-game hunting. If you find yourself sending out the social media equivalent of a press release as you knock off your top-25 list of Asia’s most exclusive restaurants, boutiques, and galleries, ask yourself: Do I travel because I yearn for a deeper understanding of the human condition? Or am I just trying to impress my friends?

DON’T post mediocre photos. Are you interested in seeing other people’s average vacation snaps? They’re not interested in yours.

DO post great photos. A stunning image can pierce the wall of bitterness, resentment, hostility, and envy that stands between you and your non-traveling friends back home and can genuinely convey the wonder of travel. Great photography conquers all. You might even be inspired to host a slide show.